Those a-holes at the Rockay City Police Department managed to get the jump on Travis Baker for once and seized a whole buncha his gaming merch. Well, not his gaming merch, but merch bought with his money–well not his money exactly, but money he lost and… Look, it’s complicated, ok?

Now all this primo merch is holed up in some evidence locker, and we’re gonna strong-arm our way in there to get it back. It’s a pretty hefty operation, you don’t need to know the specifics.

Point is, once we’re done, it ain’t safe to keep the goods together, and it sure as shit ain’t safe to sell it on because they’ll just trace it back to us, so we’re just gonna have to distribute it among trusted colleagues. That’s your incentive, by the way, in case you needed it spelling out.

Now, not everyone’s gonna get a piece, but it’s worth a shot, right? I mean, look at this haul:

1 x Laptop from Intel (Razer Blade 16 Gaming Laptop)

1 x Alienware AW2523HF Gaming Monitor ‘Dark Side of the Moon’

1 x Combined package of:

Alienware 510H headset, Lunar Light

1 x Alienware 510K keyboard, Lunar Light

1 x Alienware 510M mouse, Dark Side of the Moon

10 x Intel i7 CPUs

10 x mophie snap+ juice packs

10 x Majority Audio Bowfell Soundbars

50 x Crime Boss on PS5

50 x Crime Boss on Xbox

30 x Crime Boss hat, t-shirt and badge combo packs

Throughout September, we’re gonna distribute a code that’ll give you access to… Well, let’s not get ahead of ourselves yet. Just know that we have people on the inside at 505 and some of their pals too, and they’re gonna hide pieces of this code where random schmucks on the street ain’t gonna find them. Start with the official Crime Boss TikTok, and @CrimeBossGame for more updates. We’ll be in touch.

(And if you’re RCPD, don’t even bother–we got eyes everywhere.)

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